New signs of age

Ok... lots of questions.

At what age is it required that you must trade in your compact or mid-size car for a full size? I'm not just talking a Grand Prix... I'm talking the Buick LaSabre, the Lincoln Town Car, or my personal favorite the Mercury Grand Marquis. I know there must be an age requirement for these cars, because I've never seen anyone from age 16 to 40ish driving one. After that I lose track...

At what age does is it required to store baseball caps in the back window of your car? I'm pretty sure it is near the same age where you pick up the car mentioned above. The baseball caps are usually very flat brimmed and often mention the name of a Naval ship.



Lastly, at what age is it that you just give up looking behind you when backing up? I believe it is when you decide that you need to back into a parking spot cause it's easier than backing out. (see previous post)

The last few paragraphs set the stage for this past Sunday... We're at church. We pull in the driveway, and we see this car backing out of a space. We thought. This guy is backing out of space, across the whole parking lot, and backing into a space. He's got a big honkin' Lincoln Town Car, caps in the back window, and he's just comin back. He's not looking to see if anyone is coming at him. He's just coming. So he gets into the spot, but he doesn't stop at the normal place; Marie jokingly says, "Watch him hit the wall." I look over and see him plow into the wall and say, "Like that." We have a quick chuckle, but then this brain trust gets out of his car, and goes into church. He didn't pull up off the wall, go back to look at the car or wall for damage, or otherwise flinch at all. Apparently the wall is the signal to stop the car. And also it something he's used to, based on the reaction or lack of...

I'm trying to age gracefully, but I don't want to ever reach this age of big boat cars, flat aircraft carrier hats, bad pants, and general driving apathy. Someone kick me in the head if I start heading that way....